- jesus: i died on the cross for your sins
- me: aint nobody tell u to do that tho
The moment of pure panic when accidentally activating Siri in a quiet place
girl: spank me daddy
me: I am not ready to be a father
My anaconda don’t want none unless you got
college admissions: what was one of
your greatest accomplishments?
me: i have every scent of smencil
"you should really think about what you want to do for your futur-"